There comes a point in a relationship where someone may start feeling neglected. I have yet to meet any couple that says otherwise. My own hubby and I have had points in our relationship where other things have felt more important. Even though it can be hard, it’s so so important to talk about those feelings and work through that together. Life happens. But no one wants to feel neglected in their relationship. Here are ways to make that conversation go a little smoother.
Don’t start the conversation during an argument
It happens. We’re in the middle of having a disagreement about something and next thing you know every and anything that’s going wrong gets thrown on the table. And now you’re having the biggest fight ever. If you’re feeling neglected, don’t wait to bring it up during that argument about the dishes. Wait for a calmer moment when you both are in a better mood.
Write it down
If you’re the type who has trouble expressing how you’re feeling write it down! My hubby isn’t the best communicator (although he is working on it). And for YEARS in our younger days he’d prefer to text or even email me what was on his mind. For him, writing down his thoughts helped him to clearly explain what he was feeling and it opened the door for us to have a conversation later once everything was out in the open. While I don’t advocate for trying to solve your problems over texts, writing down what you want to say can help you prepare to have a harder conversation.
Think of solutions
No one wants to be told what they are doing wrong. And what can be even more frustrating is not knowing what to do right after you’ve been told you have been neglecting your partner. Give your partner a head start with ideas on how to help you feel like you matter. Whether that means more hugs, less laundry, or a night out once a month, let them know what you need. If you haven’t already try having you and your partner take the 5 Love Languages Quiz to find out how you receive love. It may be that your partner doesn’t feel like they are neglecting you because they are showing love the way THEY receive it versus the way you do.
If it gets heated, take a break
There’s nothing worse than having a never-ending argument. If you feel like there isn’t any progress being made, agree to take a break, reevaluate what was said, and come back later with clearer heads. Sometimes taking that break can actually help you and your partner have a better understanding of how the other person is feeling.
Remember that your a team
Sometimes the best thing we can do in a relationship is remember that we’re in this together. Be accepting of your partner’s feelings and they’ll more likely be more accepting of your own. Remember that all relationships go through seasons and love can ebb and flow during different stages of live. But if you remember that t
Deandra Samuel says
That neglected stage is where I’m at in my 7 years relationship…we had a split about a year ago that lasted six months ….I jus don’t know the love isn’t felt